Sonic Hates Camp
by ckaira77
Summary: Sonic writes his parents a truth-stretched letter about his time at camp. He hates it. Silver points out everything wrong with his little letter. Purely for entertainment.
Sonic sat down and grabbed a sheet of paper. He produced a large pencil from his backpack. He threw his bag on his bed and set his paper down on a desk and began to write his letter to his parents. He had been at camp Lenader for way too long. He had to leave. To show his desperation, he wrote in rhyme. His poor bunkmate looked over. It was Silver who had come down with a small cough. He was asleep but then woke up to see Sonic scribbling rapidly on the paper.

"What are you doing…?" he asked.

"Quiet Silver! I gotta write a letter!" yelled Sonic scribbling down the address on his envelope. He actually already finished the letter because, you know, he's Sonic. Silver looked over with interest.

"Will you read it?" Silver asked.

"Okay… Fine," Sonic huffed.

 _Hello Mother, hello Father._

 _Here I am at Camp Lenader._

 _Camp is very entertaining._

 _And they say we'll have some fun if it stops hailing._

Silver stopped Sonic. "Wait a second, I didn't think that it was this kind of letter… Wouldn't your parents want to think that they made a good choice in spending $50 to send you to camp?" he asked.

"Nope! I want them to regret their decision!" Sonic growled.

"Okay… Continue…," Silver said with a roll of his eyes.

 _I went hiking with Lily Ivory._

 _She developed poison ivy!_

 _You remember Knuckles mother?_

 _He got ptomaine poisoning after dinner!_

"Wait a sec! Lily is fine and Knuckles did not get food poisoning! Why are you lying in your letter?!" demanded Silver. He sat up in his bed and glared at Sonic.

"Oh, be quiet! You wanted to hear my pleas to get my parents to drive me home!" Sonic hissed.

 _All the counselors hate the waiters,_

 _And the lake has alligators!_

 _And sir Shadow wants no sissies,_

 _So he reads to us from something called 'Ulysses'_

"Just because one of the waiters got sent home today doesn't mean that the counselors hate them… Also, just because Vector decided to tip someone's boat over today doesn't mean that the lake has alligators! However, the part about Shadow reading us a modernist novel written by an Irish writer is correct…," Silver said.

"See! I'm not completely lying here! I'm just stretching the truth!" Sonic said, happy that Silver was starting to see things his way. He continued.

 _No, I don't want this to scare ya,_

 _But my bunkmate has malaria!_

 _You remember Tails my buddy?_

 _We're about to organize a searching party!_

"WHAT?! I DON'T HAVE MALARIA SONIC! HOW DARE YOU?! Also, I think Tails is just getting lectured by Shadow again. I think he said a word that Shadow didn't know making him feel jealous or something," Silver explained.

"So that's where he went!" Sonic yelled. He went back to reading again.

 _Take me home…, oh mother, father,_

 _Take me home, I hate Lenader,_

 _Don't leave me out in the forest,_

 _Where I might get eaten by a bear!_

"I think I am the one in the most danger of being eaten by a bear. Besides, bears don't live around these parts. I understand that you hate it here, but I'm sure that the large sign outside the camp that says that this is a bear-free area will make them suspicious…," Silver explained.

Sonic groaned and crossed out the word bear. He wrote in the word snake. His mom was terrified of snakes… he hoped.

 _Take me home, I promise I will not make noise,_

 _Or mess the house with all my toys._

 _Oh, please don't make me stay;_

 _I've been here_ _ **one whole day.**_

Silver shook his head. "You have been here one day. ONE DAY! This letter will make you seem like you're lying and will also make you look like a drama queen, Sonic!" Silver yelled.

"Oh, whatever! I act like this all the time!" Sonic snapped.

"I would hope that you didn't…," Silver mumbled.

 _Darling mother, please don't panic._

 _How's my precious brother Manic?_

 _Let me come home if you miss me…_

 _I would even let Amy hug and kiss me!_

"Let me guess… You find your brother Manic a little annoying at times… Brotherly love…," Silver exclaimed with sarcasm.

"Even so, I'd rather have him steal my wallet again rather than stay here. Listen, it's pouring cats and- Huh? It stopped raining!" Sonic yelled. He scribbled the last parts of his note onto the paper. He then raced outside and started dancing in the sunlight.

Silver looked on the desk. He read the last lines. He nearly burst out laughing. Actually, he did! It was so funny he couldn't help it after hearing his whining and complaining throughout the beginning of the letter!

 _Wait a minute; it stopped hailing…_

 _Girls are swimming, guys are sailing!_

 _Playing kickball; gee that's better!_

 _Mother, father, kindly disregard this letter! :)_

Silver put it into the envelope and licked it shut. He walked outside and stuck it in the mailbox next to the road. He was smiling to himself.

 _Sonic's parents, enjoy reading this letter from your dramatic son. You're gonna get a kick out of this…_

Song based off of: Spike Jones – Hello Mother, Hello Father!

Hope you enjoyed!


End file.
